2008 NBA Draft Diary - Part VII

By Felipe Melecio

2008 NBA Draft:

26th PICK—George Hill from IUPUI, who has a 6’9” wingspan. Stu: Hill can score, board, and dish (the Spurs got the next Jason Kidd?)
Bilas: Could be special player (at this point, anything coming out of Bilas’ mouth should be taken with a grain of salt).
Stu: Has 3% body fat (most of it on his wingspan).
Best of all, he has NO WEAKNESS. This guy could be the best guy selected so far! The Spurs did it again!

Interesting Fact: Joe Alexander was the only 20+ year-old player to be selected in the top 10. It’s like the NBA went from drafting high school players to selecting virtual 5th year Seniors—in high school.

Andy Katz: Kansas coach, Bill Self and the University itself said that Arthur tested fine medically at KU and the kidney should be a non-issue.
Well, if the NBA says it’s a problem, then it’s a problem. NBA wins.

27th PICK—Darrell Arthur, gets the pity selection. EVERYONE REJOICE! It took Arthur so long to get selected that there’s a kid who’s already sleeping at his table. Obviously, it was well past his bedtime.
Bilas: “Could really run” and “Move and slide his feet” (he can do the “running man,” “the electric” and “cha-cha slide” and can “moonwalk” with the best of them).
--“Can use both hands around the rim” (why not just say he’s ambidextrous?)
--Has a “little hook” that he uses around the rim and possesses with him the required “good turn around jump shot.”
WEAKNESS: None were mentioned—but we all know that when you have kidney issues, any other weaknesses are meaningless in comparison.

Cut to Stern giving Arthur a pity applause. That’s what this kid needs, huh?
The Hornets, who selected Arthur, don’t even want him as right away, it is reported that he’s being traded to Portland [but at this point, its all irrelevant because he ended up getting traded to Memphis, via Houston. Look it up].

In what could be Stephen A. Smith’s last interview of the night, he frankly asks Arthur what is going with his kidney. Arthur responds by saying that his medical tests came back fine, but NBA must not have gotten the results. Boo-yah, NBA! This kid is mad and has something to prove! (assuming his kidney holds up, of course).

28th PICK—Donte Green as he was projected by some mock drafts to be picked 14th overall. Maybe he has kidney problems too.
Stu: Green was born in Germany, lived in Japan, and now resides in Baltimore (geez, how many schools did he attend?).
Bilas: Not ready for the NBA (doh!) but he does have the tools, nay, lots of tools. However, he needs to find the key to the toolbox first.
It’s like I stopped watching the NBA draft and now I’m getting flashbacks of Home Improvement episodes rushing through my head.

29th PICK—What can the Pistons do to get past the Conference Finals?
Jax: The Pistons need a player that can post-up (that’s one opinion)
Jeff: With all those Eastern Conference finals, that’s a pretty good achievement that should be celebrated (I agree, but no one ever remembers the team that loses in the Conference Finals. And that is why Jeff is not coaching anymore).
Stu: Pistons need to get a little younger (well, it is the NBA draft. You can put a bunch of names on a dart board, blindfold yourself, and shoot three darts and you can unwittingly stumble upon three players who will lower your team’s average age. Stu Scott, a.k.a. “Mr. Obvious.”
D.J. White, your Big 10 player of the year
Stu: He’s full of intensity, huh Bilas?
Bilas: When White came out of high school, he reminded me of James Worthy (my mouth is agape. Interesting note, in September of 2006, http://nbadraft.net was comparing White to Wayne Simien. White was a sophomore by then. So he went from being Worthy to Simien. Sad, but true).
--He’s not the same athlete he used to be (again, he went from Worthy to Simien).
--“Nice turnaround jump shot” (THEY ALL DO!)
Stu just mentioned Isaiah Thomas (whether it was by accident or not is anyone’s guess) and the New York boo machine is rolling. To stop the boos, Stu responds, “Come on, don’t boo Isaiah.” I disagree; boo until your throat can’t boo any longer.
Stu: Do the Pistons trade any of their four best players (wow, how the mighty Pistons have fallen).
Jax: Joe Dumars’ phone is on the hook (because Dumars has trouble keeping the phone on the hook? Because Dumars doesn’t believe in telephones so he never has it on, but has it on now because his team needs to get to the Finals again?)

And now, it is time for the Champion Celtics to make their selection. While they’re on the clock, the fellows who have been broadcasting and analyzing the draft talk some Celtic basketball with the viewers at home.
Jeff: The Celtics must sign Posey. He has tenacity! (I didn’t realize that Posey was the unofficial third member of Tenacious D).
Bilas: The 30th pick is not about the player, but about gaining assets (you know, I’m trying to enjoy the draft without Bilas putting some economic spin to it).
Five minutes have been up. Please, Mr. Stern, announce the pick already!
Bilas: I’m shocked to see how young this draft is (he seriously didn’t see it coming?)
[At this point, 11 freshmen were selected; a new NBA draft record]
Here comes Stern and a lot of boos from the stands as the hated Celtics are comfortable with their selection.

30th PICK—J.R. Giddens, your 2008 Mountain West Conference Player of the Year. You know, many people thought that Chris Douglas-Roberts would be selected by the Celtics with the 30th pick. Perhaps the Celtics wanted a Senior classman on their team. I guess it does pay to stay in school!
Bilas: “Very talented player” and can hit “deep shots” (so the guy can drink, but what about his game?)

And that wraps up the 1st Round of the 2008 NBA draft. But I can’t finish this diary without mentioning Dickey V’s last appearance of the night. You’d think that it would be past his bedtime, but apparently it’s not. Quick highlights:
--Dickey V looks very mad as he goes into his “potential, potential, potential” rant.
--Wants more proven players selected (it’s an amateur draft!)
--Winners of this year’s draft were the New Jersey Nets because they selected Ryan Anderson (guy who can score, but can’t play defense. Nice!) and Brook Lopez (a big man who CAN’T REBOUND!). He also thought the Suns were winners because they picked Robin with their 1st round pick (so Shaq can teach him how to pace himself in the regular season so he can be well rested in time for the NBA playoffs. Although, from a fantasy standpoint, if Shaq is injured all season long, Robin is too young to be injured for an extended period of time. Therefore, Robin becomes a fantasy basketball commodity because he’ll see some time at Center for the Suns. Eureka!).
--Dickey V is sick of kids going to college for one year. He was mad for many years because high school kids were by-passing college to go straight to the pros. Now that these same kids are going to college for one year, he’s still mad. There’s just no pleasing this man!
--How is it that Andre Jordan, Mario Chalmers, and Chris Douglas-Roberts are not drafted yet??? Dickey V is boiling! (by the way, if CDR’s people are smart, they would look for a nice endorsement deal from some CD-R company so he can be their spokesman. Where are my kudos?).
--One final note, Dickey V thinks UNC will be the #1 team in the nation for the upcoming college basketball season, much to the delight of one Stu Scott. Why am I not surprise that Dickey V is picking an ACC team for the #1 spot again?

As written by,

Felipe Melecio
Currently Thankful of: Donny Rodriguez for inviting me to watch the draft at his house. Check him out at http://www.myspace.com/woodsugars
Currently Digging: The band Between the Buried and Me (I swear, everything they touch turns into gold).
Currently Playing: Final Fantasy Tactics A2: Grimoire of the Rift (already have logged in 24 hours game play—and counting!)